liquidartz

I am working on quite a few portraits and I have all of the almost finished and several that have only minor canvas warping. I am hoping to finish the on the fly.  This month!!
Work has been overflowth with multiple jobs and lots of new aquaintances even some artists. I have had to close down access to my pages and it has been hard as an artist to close the doors to forward motion. But there are some heavy problems in society today that are being ignored .On every level on society we carry far to much burden to ever consider all the ways society is twisted.
Drug abuse and Some pretty insane diseases are flooding the deer and cow  population and did you notice these symptoms are like zombieism.
Little things that kill.

I have to watch myself so I do not fall into the unraveling of the soul of society.
Everyone plays the blame game a hell of a lot. Take responsibility people. Promises will be delivered. I miss the real friends I used to know.
But all that glitters is not gold.
People befriend you to use you.
Karlie I miss you. Stop burning Bridges and call your sister.
Before you have no one left to turn to.
My sister you need some help.  Desperate and making desperate choices.
I don't know how I can trust you now  to help you. I feel this weight on my heart. Loss in my soul.

But I have despite the hardships been sted-fast for most of my goals. I am down to 127 pounds and still working out drinking Kombucha and shredding that weight. My arthritis has lifted and feeling better except all these little viruses and heavy emotions the reside in my heart and a missing for my family, Miss you  Mom  and And William Afton. You know who you are. 💎💎💎
My baby sister ❤️⌛⏰⏱️🕰️
Time is of the essence.

To those of you struggling with addiction and stress or disease. Just remember that your attitude towards each new day can be on point or it can be spiroling out of control. We only have this one physical body that we have been graced with.
We need to make it a temple and make your soul pure and whole. (I say with good intentions for myself )

On this Valentine's day I want to thank my love for taking care of me and Lewis all the time going out of his way to make our lives better. Michael Tribble thanks for the Massage, Orchids  and Turtles are the way to a girl's heart ❤️😍 ❤️❤️ love you bearhuggs and kisses.

Everything we do in this life is important for a lesson or a journey. I have been struggling addiction (minor addiction) compared to most addicts. Cigarettes and Sugar and my cheese addiction have all been compromised by my lack of funding. Which I have always considered a blessing in disguise when my wishes become reality. Then my nightmare at the very same time.   I have tried this last year attempting to quit my job so the less money I have the less likely I will be to contenue to smoke but it seems hard times lead to excessive smoking rather than the opposite.

 I also decided to move my art table over to the computer desk incorporating the computer keyboard underneath my drafting table. I thought in January that this would help me to be able to do more art because my previous set up was so far away from my computer if I had to multitask it was a real pain in the butt. So now I have really laxed on my art all togeather between the arthritis in my knuckles and the pain in my back trying to paint from an incline and holding one art at a 90 degree angle it is killing me. Since I started my new job working the drive thru at the local chicken place.  I feel like the fact that I am not spending all my time on the internet doing things to promote my art like making digital designs it has helped me to overcome a lot of the arthritis pain. I have also lost of ton of weight working my ass off like a teenager. I also have not worked with a better group of people in a very long time. I did not get a good team in high school and  not in college or at any job I have had in the past 10 years. I have always had one or tow good fellow employees but  and also not in Wherever you path takes you, never say I will never, I cant or I its beneath me, because as soon as you exclaim these words  the universe will open the light at the end of the tunnel and you may have to make an exception. But for every position I have taken I have learned more about people more about myself and more about life. What makes you humble what makes you boastful. What makes you nice and generous and no one can take it from you. Haters are going to hate ...Painters are going to Paint!! At the end of  the day I dream big write my dreams down and sell them to the highest bidder. I stir that sweet southern tea and I soak up the sun. I can't wait to go to the river and jump into the deep merky water. You never make it anywhere if you don't take some chances. Make some changes. I am so ready for the summer! I sure do miss the little tourist town I grew up in that made me understand what a real community feels like.
  

This winter has been so freaking cold. In the south the humidity makes the cold so much harder to stave off. This year we had snow twice and I was shocked. I actually got to see some real southern ice cycles.

On the first occation I had a new pair of Ugs so I melted down a few candle's on to the soles Of my boots and tried to capture Just a tiny bit of snow joy. But it was bitter sweet no-go. At least this time we actually got some real snow. Usually the humidity is so high we get this ..,.what I like to call "faux snow". It looks like snow but when you step on it your realize it is actually ice.  This year the flu is unreal here.   Well I did not finish all my art by Jan  and so I will put forth an effort to get all old art finished. Family portraits. Ancestry trees. Ancestry Scrolls, Holiday art. Yay

It is a cold cold winter and it is a bitter sun to shine.
The day is short and the long winter nights are dulling my senses. I hear the cow bell and the donkey I walked to the rail road tracks. When I sat down in the low ground to take a long toke. I dreamed of the sun on the beach down at the Vampire Cove. I gave into the old Dusty farmer trail as it leads back to Dean Nursery Road. I lay there and watch the wind blowing and feel the chill run down my spine.  Then the time has come to cut some timber and load down the old stove.
I could hardly see ,my eyes so dry, nose bleeds. the bright light blinded me.  I could not remember the last time I saw your face. I cried  but it was a different kind of fear. lonelyness Bleeding from my own soul. My heart pours out and it  howls forth the souls of my ancestors for one last goodbye.

 I  can't see them but I know they are there I feel them in my soul I know the memories are there. They are what you feel. For today heal your heart. build that bridge in your heart and carry on. When you feel the pain of a thousand lost souls you know the heartache that ensues great fears.  The sun heals the flesh of the wounded and the salt water drounds the sorrows.  Heart has broken a thousand times there is a callus where my heart used to be.  Cast iron Skillet laying in fire of my soul.  Seasoning the future to be cast. To sharpen the blade and bleeding coffee grinds and nicotine. I try to pull away but it enraptures me.
The guilty pleasure of all the wiles of the world. We walk the tight rope of destiny and hope we don't trip. Just the slightest little ripples can change the future indubitably.  We can choose to be happy with the cards laid out before us or we can cutthe rope and swing dangling from a wire.

What is happiness ? Is it a place a magical mountain with gemstones of crystal reflecting lite or is a feeling an emotion a cord or a vibe. The feeling you get when you land the high jump or slide down the avalanche with your combat boots on. What is love. The way the truth the hype. The risk is it worth the reward. Believe that it is and you will be happy.

 Art can transform overnight you can look at a piece of art one day and it had beautiful lush scenery and wonderful passionate message then the next day something in your life changes. whether it be someone had died or something drastic has changed as you look at the same piece of art the beautiful sky or wonderful flower now represents a memory and then the warm and fuzzy feeling is gone. I once reached out to a fellow southerner and told them I was so sorry because they had experienced so many hurricanes in the past few months and devastation. I told him I knew how he felt because it had been headed for us. He told me I had no idea how he felt and snarked and walked away. It wasn't a month later hurricane Katrina hit and I lost everything. Loosing every thing you own puts perspective on what is important in life. I stayed despite my want to run back to the Rockies where I was raised. People really don't know how it feels, but you never know what one has been through. Nor do you know what the future holds.  Being able to express artistically emotionally, empathetically or rational or irrational. Images that mean one thing to one person may mean something else to another. But if we see the world spiraling out of control it is in our best interests to make art that can reach out to those who have not felt pain, those who still have an un-ruptured soul. To show the world the consequences of allowing the behavior of  our own people to spiral out of control will only destroy us.  Many people have told me the end is nye and you can not stop it. Well sure one day that will happen but it does not have to be because we all turned our back and allowed it to happen. If only I could find a way to express these feelings on canvas. Thank you DA for pushing me to my artistic edge and making me move forward. I may not have figured out how to express these feelings on canvas yet but maybe my words will inspire someone.  I hope we will never see some of the atrocities of this world but never forget many are living it now. It is in motion and it has happened before and to sit idle and assume it wont happen to me. Is just not an option!! Just like a hurricane in the night everything can be different tomorrow.